Cracktastic Journey 7

          Chapter 7: Whiteout



L thankfully wasn't too bad on the drive back. He had giggled

himself out and ended up completely out of it leaning against

the seat, still humming Carameldansen under his breath.

   "Where are we heading?" Light asked warily as Matt

haphazardly pulled into an unfamiliar parking lot. "This isn't the

Task Force building."

"Oh," Mello answered, lifting his hands from his eyes and

quickly putting them back as Matt swerved to avoid an

unfortunate parking valet. "We're--"

The leather-loving chocoholic cut off midway, scrabbling at Matt

frantically for the wheel.

"You pink geek! WATCH WHERE YOU ARE GOING! This isn't one

of your F1 Racing games!!"

The valet looked like a deer in the headlights as the car

hurtled toward him, except one would think the headlights in

question belonged to an UPS truck judging by his wide-eyed

expression.

Matt veered nonchalantly at the last moment, wheels

screeching as he turned.

Mello let out a sigh of relief.

The valet fell to his knees, grateful to the heavens for all

eternity.

"THANK GOD," he shouted while weeping.

"Present," said Light without even thinking.

L immediately and drowsily sat up and stared at him.

"I mean omnipresent," Light caught himself quickly.

"Omnipresent, that's what God is."

L squinted at him blearily as though he was drunk, then

flopped down on the seat once more.

Mello gestured at Light, pointing to his eyes and then at Light,

mouthing, I have my eye on you.

"We're almost at the dock," Matt said happily, acting as though

he hadn't just almost squashed a pedestrian a moment ago.

"...Dock?"

    "We're heading, as I was trying to explain earlier," said

Mello, eyeing Matt ruefully, "To the loading dock so we can get

into the boat."

"What boat? No one said anything about a boat! I never asked

to go onto this crazy trip!" hollered Light at the top of his lungs.

L hiccupped and giggled again next to him. "Candy, Light-kun?"

he asked, holding out a very fuzzy lollipop he had likely dug out

from the back of the seat.

"Ew. No."

   "Light-Wighty gets seasick," L babbled, not even

acknowledging his reply and leaning over Matt's shoulder. "He

throws up."

"Shut up! I do not! And don't call me that!"

     Light could feel his face reddening.

L continued on, rambling, "Lightsy wets himself still, did you

know that? I found out the hard way..."

"SHUT UP!!..."

L settled back onto the seat, tittering like a small child. All was

quiet for a minute.

   Then,

"Aagh! L, not the wheel! Not the wheel! GET OFF!!"

    "It is not normal to be so used to this," Mello commented

drily to a shaking and hiding under the seat Light.

                                 *    * *

Mello detailed to Light that every year, after he and Matt

brought L to the dentist, they'd bring him for a little visit to his

home country, England. It was sort of a forced vacation, as L

did not believe in stopping any of his work for anything.

Nevertheless, he was dragged there yearly anyway.

  Light sorely missed his old clothes. The leather he currently

possessed was much too tight and unbreathable, though he did

think they showed off his godly divine body. That was fitting

indeed.

"Here," Mello announced.

   Matt finally obtained a parking space after circling around at

least ten times.

"Cool," he said boredly, adjusting his goggles on his head,

"How many points do I get, Mels?"

   "Uh, driving isn't a game, Matt!"

"You're right," mused Matt morosely, "I didn't pick up any coins

or run over anyone. It's sad. I really failed."

He stared, depressed, at his seatbelt as Mello and everyone

else got out. Light couldn't tell if he was honestly serious or

not.

  Mello grabbed Light's hand and ran to the edge of the pier,

pointing to a large white boat in the distance.

S. S. Sugar Rush, the front read in gothic font. The

white sails ruffled gently in the wind.

"Whoa," Light breathed, for once stunned. He was going to be

on a boat for the first time in his life. And best of all, he was

most likely to be all alone with his rival L.

Boats had accidents all the time, didn't they?

A very Kira-ish snicker was creeping up on his face, and he

quickly put it down.

  "Hey," exclaimed Matt happily. "I found a penny on the floor!

I WIN!"

*   * *